Calm in the storm

Originally written and posted on MySpace March 19, 2006

The house is quiet and a little colder than I like. I just got up and bumped up the heat four degrees. I like the house warm. It has been one of those rare days for Arizona. It has rained off and on all day and continues to do so even now. It is a good time to snuggle under a warm quilt and let your mind wander. Jan is at work and the girls are in bed. I like my quiet times. It gives me an opportunity to simply stop and relax and recharge.

Life is too busy. That is an undeniable fact but what is there to do about it? Being a parent is busy. Being a husband is busy. Being a Christian is busy. Working for a living is busy. What of these would I be willing to give up to be less busy? The answer is clearly none of them.

Still I wrestle with whether or not I am giving the right amount of time to my kids and wife and church. It seems that when I am home and ready to be with the kids, they are off doing something else. When I am at work, there are needs that I want to meet for the church. When I am busy with activities that give life to my faith I feel like I am neglecting family. It too often feels like a no-win situation.

It may be frustratiing at times but I am not sure I would have it any other way. I would rather be busy than bored. I would rather my kids see me in service to Jesus and responsible in my work than to be a TV-Aholic. I would rather work than leave my family hungery. I would rather love my wife and enjoy my life with her than to live alone or worse, in a dead relationship.

I am beginning to learn that though I could wish for more time for everything it is not going to happen. Life is all about balancing. I can only trust that God has answered my prayers and that I have been a good steward of the time I have been given each day. I will continue to stuggle but it is struggle that both strengthens and evidences life.

I love my life, my family, my God and even my job. I am blessed. How like a child I am that I still complain...